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Ways to Support an Addict Without Enabling

Supporting individuals in their addiction recovery encourages them to take full responsibility for their actions. Enabling someone, however, involves shielding them from the consequences of their destructive actions. Supporting a loved one during their recovery promotes self-reliance and sets them up for success moving forward. Enabling fosters dependence and learned helplessness, which will harm them in the long run.

Understanding Addiction in Others

If you want to support someone with addiction, then you need to understand what makes them most vulnerable to it. Certain conditions and circumstances make a person more vulnerable than others. Risk factors won’t determine your destiny, but they can help you foresee potential problems. Some of the things that make individuals more prone to addiction include:

  • Age
  • Behavioral control problems
  • Environmental factors, such as early exposure to drugs or alcohol
  • Exposure to trauma
  • Genetics 
  • Mental health concerns

If you want to understand addiction, it’s important to take note of what’s happening in the brain. Drugs and alcohol can take over the pleasure and reward cortex of the brain. Addiction can make you feel as though you are in emotional danger, and this can send your neurological circuits into overdrive. You may also feel stressed or even anxious when you cannot use drugs or alcohol.

People who have addictions become preoccupied, on a pathological level, with the addiction. It may even get to the point where it is all they can think about, and can’t stop trying to obtain their substance of choice.

Understanding the Role of Enablers in Addiction

Enabling can take many forms, often without us even realizing it. It might involve overlooking changes in a loved one’s behavior, allowing feelings of resentment to interfere with offering help, or making excuses and telling lies to cover for their addiction. Even if you're not consciously enabling someone, unintentional enabling is a common issue that many people overlook. Recognizing these behaviors is the first step to solving the problem.

Ways to Offer Support

If you want to support someone struggling with addiction, the most important thing you can do is show empathy. Every person's journey is unique, and their path to recovery will differ. Just because someone else you know overcame addiction doesn’t mean everyone will follow the same course. They may face greater challenges, experience more relapses, or find it harder overall to stay sober. Being empathetic and understanding their individual struggles is key to offering meaningful support.

Offer open communication

One of the most effective ways to support a loved one on their journey to recovery is by fostering open communication. Actively and empathetically listening allows them to process and understand their emotions. Encouraging them to talk is crucial, as expressing their thoughts and feelings can be incredibly healing. It's equally important to avoid using blaming language or criticism. Instead, express your genuine concern for their well-being and reassure them that admitting they have a problem is not a sign of weakness—it’s the first, courageous step toward recovery.

Encourage treatment

Encourage your loved one to seek professional help and offer to assist with practical steps, such as researching treatment programs or accompanying them to appointments. Be especially supportive when they book that first appointment, as this can be an incredibly challenging step for someone with a substance use disorder. Regularly checking in with your loved one can be helpful, as it reinforces that they’re not alone and have your ongoing support throughout their journey.

Promote accountability

Encourage honesty and transparency when someone is battling addiction. Support your loved one’s efforts to take responsibility for their actions and clearly outline the consequences of avoiding accountability. Emphasize the importance of owning their behavior and reminding them that they are fully responsible for their choices. This approach supports their recovery by fostering personal responsibility rather than enabling destructive habits.

Provide support after relapse

Relapsing is a common part of the recovery process for those struggling with drug or alcohol addiction. It’s unpredictable and can happen when you least expect it. It’s important to discuss the value of patience during recovery and to reassure your loved one that you believe in them. Remind them of their progress. Sometimes, even one day of sobriety is a significant achievement, and they may need to hear that.

Encourage their self-belief and make it clear that your faith in them remains unwavering regardless of setbacks. Let them know that a relapse doesn’t diminish how far they’ve come or your confidence in their ability to recover.

Addiction Treatment Near You

Take the first step in helping a loved one overcome addiction today. Our experienced team at Jackson House Recovery Center is here to provide ample support. With a strong track record of success in treating addiction, we have the expertise to help you or your loved one navigate the recovery journey. Contact us today to learn how we can assist you.

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